


The Baddest Boy in Town

by KaelleCappuccino



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire & Related Fandoms, A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M, Minor Jaime Lannister/Brienne of Tarth, More in the notes, POV Sandor Clegane, Romance, Sandor and Jaime are rivals, Sexual Tension, kind of, megamind - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-17
Updated: 2020-12-18
Packaged: 2021-03-11 00:27:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,540
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28136154
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KaelleCappuccino/pseuds/KaelleCappuccino
Summary: The role were set: Sandor "The Hound" Clegane was the bad guy. Sansa Stark was the girl he kidnapped all the time. Jaime "The Lion" Lannister was the hero supposed to save her. But then Jaime died. What is Sandor supposed to do without his nemesis now ?
Relationships: Sandor Clegane & Jaime Lannister, Sandor Clegane/Sansa Stark
Comments: 9
Kudos: 30





	1. Chapter 0 : Introduction

**Author's Note:**

> So. Obvioulsy, this is based off the animated movie "Megamind", but this is actually Westeros : expect swearing, lewd jokes and unresolved sexual tension.  
> I could try to justify why this fic exists... But I can't, I just really like this movie and I love Sandor Clegane. This is for fun, nothing really serious, everyone is a bit OOC.... It's okay, it's the end of 2020, we all deserve a break.  
> Forgive my few (numerous) mistakes, there will always some that escape my attention, I'm sorry.  
> Hope you enjoy !

  
  


When the Lannister Empire fell apart in flames, not everyone had been able to escape in time. Only the luckiest families managed to get out of there quickly enough to avoid their certain deaths.

Strangely enough, the Lannisters themselves were not one of those. In the midst of the chaos, the patriarch knew they would not all make it out alive. He had to make, in a matter of minutes, the hardest choice he would ever have to make. Surprisingly, he made it rather quickly : it would be his eldest son inside the capsule. The one that was supposed to carry on their incredible legacy. Some would say Tywin Lannister was a terrible man for not having a single second thought about this (supposedly) horrible decision, and they would be right, but at least, he welcomed death with his mind at peace, two crying children at his side.

On this other side of the catastrophe, as his father was rendering his last breath, a brother was trying to get into the last capsule available. Unfortunately, he didn’t managed to kill his little brother, despite holding his face on the fire for a reasonable amount of time. Not only the annoying boy was still alive, but his insufferable pup was biting his leg with much force. He tried to kick him, but suddenly his sister appeared in front of him and hit him with a stick. Falling over, the last thing he saw was her putting his barely even alive little brother into the capsule, joined in a jolt by the snarling dog and closing the door. In a scream of rage, he watched it fly away with despair.

Jaime Lannister and Sandor Clegane were safe and heading in the same direction. One could have thought they were both as lucky has they could get, but they would be wrong : in his luxurious capsule, Jaime had the most delicious trip. On the other hand, Sandor's journey was absolutely horrid, full of bumps and accidents that did not help with the healing of his burned face.

When finally their capsules encountered a land that could host them, one naturally ended up delicately on the porch of a lovely, and quite wealthy family who were absolutely delighted to be gifted this adorable blond child, when they were longing some of their own for so long.

Sandor just crashed on the field of a prison. But after the first wave of surprise and when all the inmates who fainted at the sight of him were woken up, they decided altogether to keep the quiet kid from the sky and his strange dog, and to raise him… as best as they could.

They taught him everything they knew : how to crypt a code, break into a house, escape from the cops… those kind of things everyone should know before reading. They soon realized that despite his gruesome appearance and his quiet manners, this kid was about ten times smarter than any of them : his ability to conceptualize and build innovative, although terrible, machines was both the pride and the living nightmare of the prison’s warden.

On the other hand, in the comfort of his suburban life, Jaime was discovering the strange powers that being on this land was giving him : flying, invulnerability, laser eyes… And great hair, obviously, much to his adoptive parents pleasure.

They were not to cross path again until a few years later, when the administration of the school decided it was maybe time for Sandor to learn other things than help the most dangerous felons of the country plan their escape : they send him to school. Specifically, to the same school Jaime was attending.

One could have predicted that they would at last form a bond. Again, they would be wrong (but terribly optimistic). When Sandor walked into the class, Jaime, who had already been there for a few months, was already well accepted amongst his classmates : his handsome blond locks and green eyes earned him quite a lot of enamored looks, and his easy laugh, rightfulness and super strength sit particularly well with the teachers.

But kids would not give Sandor enamored looks. At first, some of them would cry when he was sitting next to them, but the more and more time they spend on his company, the more a disgusted curiosity would creep into their eyes. They were interested in Stranger, Sandor’s pup, but would not come near after witnessing him eat an entire piece of raw meat. Seeing his classmates liking Jaime way more than him, Sandor thought that maybe, he could buy their affection the same way the blond boy seemed to do it : creating candy. Well, Jaime was not exactly creating candy, just heating up pop corn with his laser eyes, but Sandor could try to do the same. He just needed a machine.

But machines were not superpowers. After almost setting school in fire, to his own greatest terror, and being send to the corner by Jaime himself, Sandor gave up on fitting in. Fortunately, he still had Stranger, and while he was feeling sad and misunderstood most of the time, at least, they were two against the world.

As they were growing up, Sandor was understanding less and less why he was left out. Yes, Jaime had super-strength and invulnerability, but Sandor was easily the second best on the physical plan : he was taller than all the other kids and stronger too. He was agile and fast, but no matter how high he could jump, Jaime could still fly. Somehow, he was always the one getting punished, and the more time he was spending getting reprimanded, in the corner, laughed at, the more anger and resentment he was feeling.

At the end of the day, Sandor came to this conclusion : what was the point in trying to be good, if you’re going to be punished for it anyway, when he was so talented at being bad ? And if he had to be bad, he would be the baddest boy of them all ! Jaime maybe was destined to be a hero, always saving the day with his terribly good looking hair, but Sandor was to be the villain of the story.

And so began his life-long, epic villain career. And he loved it ! The more Sandor and Jaime grew up, the more elaborate their battles were. They were featuring in the newspapers almost every month. Jaime would win some, and Sandor would get very close to win others. The blond boy evolved into a handsome, still blond, man and took the name “The Lion”, defender of Westeros. Sandor, with his now infamous burns and giant’s looks, settled on a more humble nickname : The Hound, criminal genius and simply best villain of all time !


	2. Chapter 1 : The Observatory

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy to see people on board :) here's the actual first chapter. The narration changes a little bit.  
> I'm literally following the movie. There will be some alterations, because I can't help it, but only later on.  
> Also, I am so sorry of my time concordance, I know there's something wrong with it but I can't figure it out. I'll use my english lectures for the next chapter :)  
> Enjoy !

In his special, ultra-securised cell, the one the old inmates had decorated for him. Sandor was patiently waiting. It had been a few weeks since his last arrest and everything had been quite calm.

“But not for long” he thought, trying not to evilly smirk too obviously.

He heard the grid outside the door grind open, and the sharp voice of the prison’s warden Selmy ordering the guard to put down his magazine. Sandor positioned himself right under the little window on his door : it was getting harder and harder to scare the old man, who basically knew him since he arrived here. The man who, at first, couldn’t look at his burned face without feeling sick, now was able to glare at him at each of his trials with an annoyed look on his face. Sandor had to jump-scare him to obtain a reaction now.

Selmy looked through the window, only to see an empty chair slowly turning on itself.

-Hey !

Did the man escaped ? Again ?

-Hello, warden.

The ravaged face of the villain popped right in front of him, and despite his usual composed standing, Selmy gasped in fear, instinctively stepping back and almost falling. He was used to this half-face, he was ! But maybe more from far away, safely from the bench in the tribunal. The scars looked even more terrible up-close : red, pocked with craters and cracks so deep they seemed black, and while his eye was miraculously undamaged, clear and stormy, he was missing an ear.

Sandor’s dark laugh resonated in the cell as he heavily sat back in his chair. The warden’s tired face scrunched in anger.

-Good morning Selmy ! The man’s tone was cynical. You will never guess : I am a changed man and I feel ready to re-inter society as a solid citizen !

-You’re a villain ! Growled the old man back. Always has been, always will be, you’ll never change, nor leave this place for the matter.

-Aren’t you a funny old man ?

Selmy choose to ignore the last mockery and raised a hand holding a gift wrapped in colorful paper :

-You’ve got mail.

-Oh ! Is it a puppy ?

Selmy opened the present : it was a watch.

-From the Lion. There’s a card with it : “To count every second of your 85 life sentences.”. Ahah, what a great man. Gloating, but I guess that’s just how he is. Nice taste in watches ! But since you’re not allowed near technology, I think I’ll keep it.

Right in front of Sandor, he wrapped the watch around his wrist, admiring the delicate work of the jewelry.

-Any chance you could give me the time ? Asked Sandor with a half-smile. I wouldn’t want to miss the opening of The Lion’s Museum…

-I think you’re going to be late by thousands of years Sandor, too bad, really.

The warden turned on his heels as Sandor was restraining himself from laughing madly :

-Oh...Am I, though ?

* * *

On the other side of the town, in front of the gigantic Lion’s Museum, a young woman was enthusiastically announcing the opening of the great building in front of the Red Keep’s Channel n°1’s cameras :

-It’s a beautiful day, in beautiful downtown, where we’re here to honor a beautiful man… The Lion. His heart, is an ocean, inside a bigger ocean ! For years, he’s been watching us with his super vision, saving us with his super-strength and caring for us with his super-heart. Now it’s our turn to give something back !

The cameraman looked dreamily at her while she was speaking. In the bright sunlight, her long red hairs seem to be made out of fire and her blue eyes were shining with conviction. Truth be told, she was a sight for the eyes, and many were the men who turned around just to catch a glimpse of her aura. Or maybe because by now, she was somewhat of a celebrity, thanks to The Lion.

-This was Sansa Stark, reporting live from the dedication of The Lion’s Museum.

-The stuff they make you read, darling… sneered her partner as he was putting the camera down, rolling his eyes with scorn. Un-be-lie-va-ble, it’s crazy

The redhead looked midly offended :

-I wrote that piece myself, Harry.

He froze, his smile crisped :

-I meant that I can’t believe that in our modern society, they let actual art get onto the news !

She crossed her arms with a knowing smile :

-Nice save.

He looked at her with eyes gleaming :

-Why don’t we just go grab a coffee or something ?

-Hum, come on, it’s time to get into The Lion’s day spirit ! She dismissed his proposition with an embarrassed scoff and a gorgeous smile.

She walked up to the van where they were keeping their material to put away her mike.

-Well, if I was The Lion, claimed Harry following her, The Hound would not be kidnapping you all the time, that’s the first thing.

She let out a soft laugh :

-Oh, that’s sweet.

-I’d be watching you like no one else would darling, you know that ?

He took the mike out of her hands to put it with the others, as he went on and on about watching over her with care and love. While she was looking at him, silently embarrassed, none of them saw the window opening in the middle of nowhere, right next to Sansa. A mechanic arm went out of it and sprayed something onto her face. She immediately fainted but before she could even touch the ground, the arm grabbed her and pulled her inside what seemed to be an invisible vehicle. Harry was still talking :

-Not that we’re in love, of course, we’re not in love, I’m not in love with you, Sansa darling…Darling ?

But when he turned around, the girl was gone.

* * *

Selmy looked at his wrist with satisfaction : this was a fine piece of technology. He couldn’t quite figure out what was the fourth quadrant for, but he had the time and it looked great. That what mattered.

Except that, unbeknownst to him, as he was walking through the long and grim corridors of the prison, the fourth quadrant turned on itself and a little red light started to blink. A ray of blue light went out of the watch and scanned the warden. In a matter of second, like magic, it wasn’t Selmy anymore barking orders to lazy guards, but the terrific figure of The Hound. Or he only seemed to be The Hound, as an observant person could have noticed he was shorter and his voice higher. But the guards only saw the burns and reacted as trained :

-Freeze !

They got up precipitately, tasers in hands, to catch the very confused man :

-Whoa, what are you doing ? Guys ! It’s me, it’s the warde..

Without taking the time to listen, the guards electrocuted him with a loud zap. Selmy fell into their arms, half-unconscious, but still under the identity of the criminal. They dragged him back to what they thought was his cell. The real Hound was hiding as best as he could behind the large chair. As soon as they strapped the warden on it, he took back the watch, giving immediately his identity back to Selmy :

-You fools… groaned the old man to the horrified guards. He’s tricked us…

His full height taking up the whole space of the door frame, Sandor let out a dark chuckle :

-You were right…

He manipulated the watch and in a blue flash, took the appearance of the warden :

-I’ll always be a villain.

He turned around, setting up all the security devices put there to stop him, so that Selmy and his men stayed trapped in his cell, and made his way to the exit with a satisfied smirk, feeling their angry looks on his back.

Once out, he waited for his ride : the invisible car wasn’t far. Indeed, soon, Stranger was pulling up in front of the prison, opening the car door :

-Well hello, good looking ! Said the robot (**). Need a lift ?

-Certainly do !

He jumped in the car and the both (three if you counted the unconscious girl in the back) of them headed to their secret base at full speed :

-I’m free ! roared Sandor. Nice work sending me the watch Stranger !

He turned it on his wrist to regain his true identity, scars and stormy eyes included.

-You got it boss !

He turned on the radio : The Lion had made his entrance in front of the Museum. Even through the station, he could hear the crowd cheering. The blond idiot was probably making a show out of himself, flying above everyone and displaying his incredible strength for everyone to admire.

_Hello, Westeros._

Sandor would recognize this voice anywhere. Jaime was starting his speech.

_Let’s get real for a moment. It’s a great honor to have a museum in my name, really it is...It’s great. But you wanna know, what’s the greatest honor you’ve given me is ?_

The crowd cheered and Sandor rolled his eyes, passably annoyed. So much noise.

_Do you really wanna know ? I’ll tell you. The greatest honor you’ve given me is letting me serve you, helpless people of Westeros. And at the end of every day… Well I often ask myself… Who would I be, without you ?_

Someone must have said something in the audience that couldn’t be heard on the radio, for his next words were :

_And I love you, random citizen !_

Even his laugh was handsome, which was really infuriating. The car stopped smoothly, as they had arrived while Sandor was listening to his nemesis. He got out and stretched :

-Ah, I tell you Stranger, there’s no place like home.

-I kept it cold just how you like it !

Sandor stripped out of his prison clothes and got back into his usual black wears : dark and comfortable pants, leathers boots and a shirt whose plainness was compensated with silver rings and earrings. He hated latex and suspected The Lion to have some sort of kink to wear such a skin tight costume.

-How do I look ? Nah, don’t say, horrific as always, I know.

-I would have said disgustingly horrifying boss !

-You always know what to say, don't you ? sighed Sandor.

-The bots missed you !

During his early college years, Sandor had build a small army of little bots, not quite birds, but not quite drones either, with a programmed mind you could compare to a dog or a microwave, depending on the philosophical point of view. They were quite attached to their creator and although Sandor would not say it at loud, he was too :

-Well Daddy’s back !

The bots all snuggled up to him, fighting for a caress.

-No biting ! You want the wrench ? Go get the wrench !

He threw the metal instrument across the hangar and all the bots followed after it.

-Now, back to our plan !

In the center of the lair was a large circle surrounded by intricate machines. In the center of it, stood a single wooden chair. Thrown upon the robot’s shoulder, the kidnapped young woman started to groan feebly.

-She awake ! Observed Sandor, quite excited. Quick, to work !

Stranger sat down the prisoner, still tied, on the chair. She had a bag on her head keeping her from seeing where she was. Sandor sat on his own chair, turning his back on her for a dramatic entrance. She was mumbling more and more loudly, surely from the panic. Yeah, it was probably panic.

The robot removed the bag and she sighed in relief. Sandor slowly turned on his chair to face her, an evil smirk on his ugly face :

-Miss Stark… we meet again.

-Would it kill you to wash the bag from time to time ? She complained loudly.

She didn’t seemed panicked, just slightly annoyed . But even after being pass out on the back of his car with a bag on her head, she still managed to be the most beautiful woman Sandor had ever saw. But he didn’t let her long, nude and tied up legs distract him. Very long legs, white and smooth and...

-You can scream all you wish, Miss Stark ! I’m afraid no one can hear you.

She wasn’t screaming. She was looking at him, shining blue eyes more annoyed than scared. What was wrong with her ?

-Why isn’t she screaming ?

-Miss Stark, if you don’t mind… politely asked Stranger.

-Like this !

Sandor pressed a button and a loud, horrified voice filled the room.

-But that’s, that’s a poor lady scream, maybe you’re not…

One of his bots arrived full speed at him, holding the wrench he had thrown earlier and hit the board : several screams from different rehearsals he held for situations like this at the beginning of the year, started to go off, including the ones the didn’t kept because we could hear him mumbling to himself while editing.

-Ah, stupid !

While he was trying to stop the cacophony, Miss Stark was looking around with curiosity and asked with her little polite voice :

-Is there some kind of supervillain website where you get Tesla coils and blinky dails ?

-Actually, Stranger felt obliged to answer, most of it comes from an outlet store in…

-Don’t answer that !

Sandor had managed to quiet all the artificial screams and was looking at his robot and his hostage casually talking with controlled rage in his eyes. Stranger hold his gaze with the led that represented his eyes and a best as a robot could, whispered to Sansa :

-Braavos…

-Don’t ! Stop !

Sandor thrown himself between the two of them, pushing his partner away from the young woman, eyeing her suspiciously :

-She’s using her nosy reporting skills on your weak-willed mind to find out all of our secrets.

He got closer his prisoner, leaning down to be at eye level, half-hoping she would flinch away from his scars :

-Such...tricks…

It was really hard to not drown into her blue eyes, especially when they were fixed on him. Especially when she winked at him with a malicious smile.

-...won’t work ...on me.

-Please, talk slower.

Was she teasing him ? Did she thought it was funny to toy with him like that ? He swallowed hard :

-Temptress, he whispered, their faces so close he could feel her breath on his ravaged lips and he had to restrain himself from resting his hand on her thigh.

Head a little foggy, he pulled away to get back to his actual work : destroying The Lion, that was his goal of today. Nothing else. Focus Hound !

-Wait, what secrets ? This time, she was clearly making fun of him, a laugh transpiring through her words. You are so predictable !

He turned around, a bit offended :

-Predictable ? Predictable ? He pulled a level. Oh, you call this, predic…

-The alligators ? Yes, I was thinking about it on the way over…

She didn’t seemed phased at all by the ferocious beasts splashing water below her, in the hole that had opened the level around her chair. Gods she was impossible !

-But what’s this ? He pulled another level. In your face !

An enormous gun machine pointed directly in between her blue eyes appeared from the ground, but she didn’t flinch and let out an adorable laugh instead :

-Cliché.

Absolutely furious, he didn’t gave up and started to pull all sort of levels and push all kind of buttons, but the only sounds coming out of her delicious mouth were not screams :

-Juvenile. Tacky. Seen it. Garish.

How were her insults were both mocking and sweet to hear, it was unbelievable. Sandor was beginning to feel a drop of angry sweat on the good side of his forehead when he heard her say :

-Oh, the spider is new.

The spider ? What spider ?

-Uh ?

He turned around : dangling from a thin filament, an enormous spider was descending right in front of Sansa’s face, who was beginning to pull away ill-at-ease. Ahah, he had her ! He walk up to her again :

-Yes ! The..the spider ! The most….uh… the most tiniest bite from this… arachnis deathicus and…

She pouted and blow on his face, throwing the eight legged monster right onto it.

-Ah, get it off me !

Stranger smacked him across the head and he fell on his back. And she was watching, damn it ! he thought with humiliation and furor :

-Uh, give it up Hound… Sansa sighed with pity. Your plans never work.

That kind of hurt. He got on his feet, eyeing her without showing how deep her remark stung :

-Let’s stop wasting time and call your boyfriend...

He practically spat the word. He didn’t knew why, but Jaime always infuriated him way more when Sansa was involved. She was fueling his resentment, and he needed the motivation.

-..in thighs, shall we ?

It was always good to remind her that her hero was wandering around with latex modeling his butt. He tore his glare off her and started the plan : first, the smoke with the lighting bolt right behind the museum, then, the raise of the huge drone above the statue. He had hidden a few bots in the soon-to-be terrorized crowd, and they would fly out to project on the giants screens what was happening in his lair right now. He was sure to have Jaime’s full attention.

-Video starts in 3, 2, 1…

Sandor positioned himself straight in front of the camera with a devilish grin : he knew there would be children to scare in the audience, and they were all looking up at the dark, yet fascinating show he was giving, as he could see on the video the bots were sending him. The red led stopped blinking and the recording began :

-Hello, Weesteros !

-Hound !

Jaime was flying high in the airs, a mike in hand.

-Well done Lion, how did you recognize me, I wonder, Sandor couldn’t help the sarcastic comment.

The crowd was booing him, but he didn’t care.

-Should have know you’d try to crash along the party.

-Oh, I intend to do more than crash it. This is a day you and Weesteros shall not soon forget !

-It’s pronounced Westeros.

-Ugh, it’s all the same…

-We all know how this ends… Jaime made a large gesture designing the crowd. With you behind bars ! The smallfolk cheered.

-Truly, Sandor rolled his eyes, bored at their unity, I’m shaking in my baby-seal leather boots.

-You have baby-seal leather boots ?? He heard an outraged Sansa exclaims behind him.

-You will leave Weesteros, he ignored her, or this will be the last you ever hear of Sansa Stark !

The camera pointed to the tied up woman, and the Lion gasped in horror :

-Sansa ! Don’t panic San. I’m on my way !

-I’m not panicking, she answered shrugging despite the bounds that were holding her wrists behind her back.

-In order to stop me, you need to find me first, am I right Lion ?

-We’re at the abandoned observatory, quickly confessed Sansa with a smug grin on her face.

-Aah, no we’re not !! Don’t listen to her, she’s crazy !

But The Lion had already fly away from the scene, and was heroically heading to the old observatory towering half the city and the sea that was bordering it on the south side.

-The Lion is approaching boss.

Stranger pointed at the radar.

-Ha ! Miss Stark seemed triumphant, to Sandor’s greatest pleasure :

-Ha to you !

She lost her confidence seeing his satisfied grin and looked very confused as he removed all the threatening devices around her. By now, Jaime should have arrived. When she realized that, her eyes widened in horror. Sandor couldn’t help an evil laugh:

-Seven Hells, you didn’t think you were in the real observatory, did you ?

He dramatically pulled a level, opening a large widow : they were in fact, not in the observatory, but in a poor copy of it down next to the sea, and had a splendid vision of the real one up on the hill. Sansa was surprised, he could see it in her eyes and it filled him with glee.

-Ready the death ray, Stranger !

-Death ray readying.

They had build up inside the real observatory another screen through which they could exchange with The Lion, and as soon as it was sure the hero had arrived, the communication was establish :

-Over here, old friend. In case you haven’t noticed, you’ve fallen right into my trap.

-You can’t trap justice. It’s an idea, a belief.

Gods he was annoying !

-Even the most heartfelt belief can be corroded over time.

-Justice is a non-corrosive metal.

-Metals can be melted by the heat of revange !

-It’s revenge, and it is best served cold !

Ugh, why did he always had an answer to everything ?

-It can be easily reheated in…

-Boys !

They both turned towards Sansa, still tied up but less surprised and more annoyed than a few minutes earlier.

-You both have a big one, can I go home now ?

Sandor was pretty sure he had a bigger one than Jaime, but right now it didn’t matter:

-Of course you can, Sandor growled, that is, if our dear Lion can withstand the full concentrated power of the sun ! Stranger ? Fire !

Nothing happened. Jaime rose an eyebrow. Sandor frowned :

-Excuse me for a minute.

He walked out of the video frame to see if everything was alright on Stranger’s side :

-It’s still warming up boss, said the robot pointing at the screen.

-Come again ?

-Warming up.

-The sun is warming up ? What ?

-In just a few seconds… Just one more…

-Honestly ! roared Sandor at the peak of his frustration. I told you to have things ready, I told you didn’t I ? Countless times !

From the other side of the room, he could hear him The Lion was still on screen :

-I’m on my way San !

-Just admit your plan is failing, sighed Sansa.

-Good luck with that one, sighed the robot.

-Whose side are you on, Stranger !?

-The losing side ! Interrupted the woman. By the way, could someone stamp my Frequent Kidnapping Card before The Lion gets here ?

That’s it, Sansa was really getting on his nerves :

-You of all people should know we discontinued that promotion ! Come on, Stranger, let’s get out of here.

-Same time next week ?

Did she had any idea of her innuendos ? He decided to stay silent with dignity : he would not give her the satisfaction of a sarcastic respond. But as he was about to leave, he heard something… Well something he never thought he would ever hear :

-Fucking hells, gods… damn it !!

It was The Lion on the screen, still in the observatory. Sandor stopped dead in his tracks, and slowly turned around, his gray eyes narrowed :

-What did he just say ?

Sansa’s mouth was open in the most delicious and perfect “O”.

-You son of a bitch, stupid…

Jaime was going on and on, slamming himself onto the walls of the semi-sphere with loud banging noises, but not much results. Sandor walked up to the screen to a better observation : what was the man doing ?

-Seven Hells, grunted Jaime. I’m trapped !

Trapped ? He was never trapped !

-What kind of fuckery is this ? Mumbled Sandor with suspicion.

-You mad genius ! The Lion spat at Sandor. Your efforts have finally paid off !

-They...they have ?

-This dome is obviously lined with valyrian steel !

-Yeah. So ?

-My only weakness ! It drains my powers !

-What ? Valyrian steel ? Your weakness is valyrian steel ? You’re kidding, right ?

But the hero was obviously not kidding. He seemed out of breath, standing up with more and more difficulties. Sandor glared at him through the screen : what the hell was going on ? Behind him, Stranger seemed more and more agitated :

-Boss !

-What ?

The robot pointed his articulated finger towards the screen linked to the death ray. The weapon was charged with maximum capacity and a countdown was approaching 0 dangerously fast. Sandor opened his mouth without knowing what his next order will be, but before he could even spoke, all the lights went red and somewhere high up in space, the death ray was shooted. It went through the atmosphere in a fraction of second and landed right on the observatory, Jaime still breathing heavily on its ground. The building exploded with a powerful flash of white light, under the stupefied eyes of Sandor. Orange flames and dark smoke rose from where stood once the majestic dome, and the shock wave was so strong the entire lair was shaking, the forceful wind projecting Sandor and Stranger on the ground.

Everything seemed to calmed down a bit after a few seconds. Ashes had tainted Sansa pale face and her hair were all thrown back in knots. Sandor and Stranger stumbled on their feet, completely stunned :

-I don’t think even he could survive that…

-Well, let’s not get our hopes up just yet, rationalized Sandor with little conviction.

Indeed, Stranger pointed something flying towards them in great speed from the burning hill :

-Look !

-The Lion ! Sansa seemed beyond relieved.

-See, I told you, grunted Sandor at his partner. We should get the hell out of here, and quick !

But he hadn’t time to turn yet, the flying man in a cape landed right in his arms like a meteor, seemingly out of control, and made them both collapsed on the ground. Sandor gasped : something didn’t felt right. At all. Jaime wasn’t moving and most importantly, Jaime would never fail a landing that spectacularly. He lifted the cape covering the hero: it wasn’t Jaime. He gulped. Not anymore at least. It was a skeleton. An irrational and digusted fear sized him :

-Fucking Seven buggering Hells, Holy Mother of…

Sandor kicked the corpse away from him and the bones fell clattering on the ground, right in front of Sansa who screamed in genuine horror and fainted. Her two kidnappers were still staring at their former enemy with round eyes :

-You… You did it boss.

-I did it ? I… I did it ?

It felt surreal. Like floating somewhere both very high in the air, and very deep in the ocean. Sandor could not tear his eyes away from the still fuming cape. No more Jaime ? He won ? What did this even mean ? Surely it was a trap. Surely Jaime could not die like...like that !

But he did. He was dead. Sandor had won. It dawned on him. He won ! He outsmarted the hero ! He did it !

-I did it !

-You did it !

-Weesteros is mine, concluded Sandor with a low laugh.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ** This is NOT a plot-hole. It will be explained later, stay with me :)

**Author's Note:**

> i will be now running away


End file.
